A young gentleman killed in the Pulse Nightclub massacre speaks about his mom and dad and the continued experience of those left behind.
I can’t help the heaviness. It’s a part of the energy I’m working with, Mom, dad, everybody, there is so much angst going on right now. You feel it. You know it. With all the shootings, with all the intensity of all of the angst that people are expressing, that’s what my parents are feeling. They’re feeling it. They’re feeling self-animosity in a way that is too much for any soul to bear. They feel their own desire to not be who they are, to not experience life the way they are experiencing it. They see it in people around them.
They feel it with every trigger pulled - the fear being expressed as anger; self-animosity being projected as hate of others. That’s what it is.
We’re all One and we’ve lost our connection to our self, to our divine self, to the energy of the One that we are, that oneness that moves through us when we are kind and appreciative of another, when we act selflessly in acts of generosity towards others who need it. We forgot that that’s our payment for existing. It’s how we balance the scales in our human experience - every time we give to another, every time we support another in their experience compassionately, unconditionally without any expectation, without any judgments, without any harsh, negative ideas.
About his mom and dad
27:12
Give my mom the platform. Give her a mike and a stage and tell her to let it all out. I wish I could scream that from the rafters. She has so much to say, so much to tell people about what it’s been like for her and how important it is for her to share that story so people understand that it wasn’t just a day, it wasn’t just an experience years ago, it’s something that happens every single day in so many people’s lives for years and years and decades thereafter.
That’s the truth of it and only the moms and dads and siblings can really verify it and really try to come together now and establish a precedence where the victim isn’t just the one that died. The victims aren’t only the ones that get shot. It’s those in their families, those in their immediate circle of friends, those people that they would influence and connect with and shore up and stabilize because of their presence in their life. There’s a need for those people to come together because now they can join hands and reach from one ocean to the other. Think about that. They can see it as wrapping their arms around the country also and saying, “We need to love each other. That’s how we’re going to heal.” It’s a big anniversary. It’s a big feeling of celebrating my life that is interpreted as grieving my death.
Somehow, someday, she’ll feel me in that way. I know because I live in her heart and I feel her growing and shifting and changing. I know that every year when it comes back to this moment, she’s going to dive headfirst into the grief. I know that now. I expect it and so does she. Yet, each year, she struggles to resist that feeling of inevitability. She tries to come up with ideas and things she can do to make it a celebration, to do things differently, to honor my existence and I love her for that. Sometimes she just doesn’t have the energy to do any of it. I hope she knows that those are the moments where she knows she needs the love, she needs the support, and she can give herself that without judgment. She does work the process. She looks at life differently now.
I know it has changed her. I know she tried hard not to let it change her and I know she still considers things that she used to consider but she does it differently now. She does think differently now. She does feel differently now about everything, about every area of life. There’s no fixing it. There’s no changing her. There’s no changing her back. There’s no fixing something broken.
Now it is just adapting what is –- adapting who she is now to what is happening now.
But that is a big shift. It’s not, any more, like she’s trying to be what she once was or even wanting life to go back the way it once was. This might be the biggest shift since my passing that she moves through but, of course, that’s how we do things. We use the energy of the moment to see what we can add as souls to the experience.
I love her and I’m going to keep loving her through this, both of them. My father is standing strong and breaks a little each day — each time there is another shooting, each time there’s more death, each time nothing changes. He’s so big-hearted. He’s so compassionate and caring and empathetic. What do you say about those two? They’re going to keep giving and doing and trying. I know that you can look at it and say this must be so hard for them to go through and it is. I also know that you know each new shooting is a way that their soul tries to say we’ve got to keep fighting this.
So, we keep holding them in that astute energy of unconditional love and reverence for their willingness to be this for all of us. My part was easy. As much as everybody wants to think about me in pain and what I lost, it’s nothing compared to their experience – nothing – and the world needs to know that. They’re the victims, the real victims.
Channeled June 2, 2021
by Laura Mirante
www.lauramirante.com
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