Interpersonal Relationships


Interpersonal Relationships

Podcast, Body, Mind, Spirit U

We engage this energy with a sense of the direction that we look to take it in with a sense of what it is souls here in physicality are looking to hear. We ask that you each open your minds, open your hearts, and allow what is to come through to be integrated into your awareness without immediate dismissal, without any rejection that may come up: the many previously held beliefs or considerations about who you are and what you are capable of. There is a sense here in the energy that many of you are wondering what is going on with the interpersonal relationships in your lives – what is happening with people and with the way people interact with one another. You are wondering why this one, who you thought you knew so well, is acting in a way that is something that you are accustomed to experiencing from this one. There are others in your life and you are watching how the relationships are shifting and how people are shifting in and out of each other’s experiences.

There are so many questions when this happens. When souls move into the physical experience they have a sense of the direction they want to take their life in. They have a sense of the kind of experiences they look to integrate into their awareness. You see as energy that’s what it is all about – what vibration can we experience in this life and through what circumstances, what situations, and with what other human beings or animals or creatures on the Earth? How can we allow ourselves to experience these different ways of being? How can we allow ourselves to understand what affects who we are?

What affects our ability to know who we are? What affects our ability to be who we know we are? There are so many factors. There are so many instances that we can give you where your life begins to show you where you allow the outside in.

What exists inside you is a knowing, a knowingness that whatever it is you are experiencing has some value, has some purpose, that there is something in it for you. There is a sense that when a relationship shifts the individuals tend to look at themselves and say, well, what did I do wrong or what did they do wrong? There tends to be this idea that there needs to be some blame and also some responsibility taken.

Yet if you think of life in terms of energy as the souls that you are you think of how the energy is just here to experience physicality and all interactions that occur in this physical world, in this physical lifetime, all enhance the experience. All create intensities that you can then allow yourself to move through from whatever perceptive state you choose and you choose it by the way you view the experience.

When Romantic Love Shifts

So when we speak in terms of relationships, and you all think in terms of partners here, you think in terms of these commitments that you’ve made to one another - these logically driven commitments. Many of you would say, well, they were heart-centered. They are heart-centered because when I met this other I felt a love like no other and I committed to be with this other for the entirety of this human experience so that I can prove that that love was real.

That is a poignant point right there. That is something you want to ponder – the idea that in the ego interpretation of true love it means it must last with the same intensity throughout a lifetime. As any human being that’s ever been in a long-term relationship knows on this earth plane that kind of love, that intensity that you experience in the first few days, doesn’t remain the same. It shifts. It mutates. It molds from the experience - from the energies that you put in, the energies that your partner puts in, to the relationship. It creates a new form. That is life itself.

That is true about all life. Life is love.

Life is divine loving energy manifesting and as you all know life doesn’t stay the same. It continually changes. It morphs. It grows. It expands. It shifts. It redefines itself through this ever-changing process. So do you. So does every other human being on the earth and so do your relationships. That intense spark you felt when you met was a sign. It was a signal from your soul that says, hey, here’s someone we have an agreement with. Here is someone we have a contract with or here is someone we have some karma with. It is simply a signal that says, hey, there is something more to explore with this one. There is an experience or an energy we came to exchange while we’re here in these physical bodies.

But you know the spark intellectually means this must be the ONE. This must be the sign from my soul that I am to mold my life around this other that I feel this strong intensity with or, oftentimes, there is that kind of connection, there is that kind of commitment, to make that kind of relationship in the physical to have that kind of experience together. Oftentimes it is for a lifetime. Oftentimes it truly is that fairytale kind of spark that they like to speak of. But those are not the only sparks that occur. Those are not the only recognitions we have as souls in physicality. There just are no fairytales written about the others.

There are no statements being made about how a spark can mean so many different things and so many different things can come of that spark – like a wildly intense romantic relationship that from the get-go looks like it has all the makings of that perfect fairytale and then somewhere along the way something shifts, something changes. Sometimes it is an experience that you can actually put your finger on and say, well, that’s it. That’s what happened and now we are different because of it so we are going to split.

Sometimes it is not so obvious. Sometimes the energy just seems to dissipate, just seems to disappear. There just seems to be no intensity between you anymore. That’s a lot of where that blame game comes in, where we start to want to figure out which one of us gave up, which one of us moved away from that initial intensity. Even if there are manifestations of that in the physical - even if you say one stepped out on another and so this deserves to happen - beneath the surface of all that the truth of the experience is it is shifting. The experience that you came to have together is shifting. So you thought it was this and maybe it is that.

What do you when it shifts? How long do you play the blame game? How long do you play victim? How long do you sit in remorse, in confusion, in desperation, in self-arbitration? How long do you feel the shift and not honor it? When will you give yourself permission to be a soul having a physical experience where the souls says, this intensity that we once felt for each other is done. Now let’s move on. Let’s find something else. Let’s create more intensity or let’s move on and find others to create intensities with so that we can each expand. Either way it moves. It is about shifting. It is about experiencing something new.

So what we are really bringing to the forefront here is the idea that if it is shifting then check in and see in which direction do you feel the energy is shifting you toward and you must battle your way through all of the practical, rationalizations that will be thrown at you from others and that will certainly be strolling through your mind in order to get your attention. You have to get beyond all of that to really check in – to really check in without any defined inclination in your humanness with a sense of complete surrender saying, ”Okay, dear soul, you are the one defining this experience so I ask you in all truth to give me a sense of the direction I am to move in. I have no attachment to any desired outcome and I am giving myself permission to feel free to follow what it is my heart guides me to.”

It is a simple process but you all know, as human beings, how difficult it becomes because it is not so easy to quiet that mind. It is not so easy when those around you are giving you all of these suggestions and all of these concepts or maybe versions of experiences they have had and they come with great certainties because if you have been in an experience you are a master of it, right? You understand that nobody has been in your experience and nobody else can interpret what it is going on between you and this other soul - in what direction your souls are looking to move in.

Are you looking to come closer together through a change in your environment, through a change in your perception of one another through a willingness to work through the hard times? Or are you looking to set each other free to have new experiences or to challenge each other through the separation and all the emotion and instability that come with that; to challenge each other to know that there is more to life than just the experience you two had?

There is no right or wrong. There is no certainty in any one direction when it comes to relationships. Each and every single individual interaction that you have with human beings is uniquely defined by the two of you in that given moment according to every experience that has happened to you and everyone that has affected your life up until that point. It doesn’t just affect partners. You understand this goes right in to our relationships with family, our relationships with friends, and how they come and go at different points in our life - how some stay and some are like the wind.

What you really want to do is relegate all relationships down to soulful experiences: then you don’t take it so personally and you don’t beat yourself down for not being what another expected you to be or you don’t get so heavy in the judgment of what another should have been to you. When you can truly step back, when you can truly see that this is your opportunity as a soul to be physical - to be here on the earth and experience and life asks you to change and to shift and to accept whatever it is that is going on in whatever relationships you are considering - you could pull yourself to that awareness that knows that this is just an experience and as I move through this I will engage another experience and another if I will allow myself.

You are not, in any way, saying that there is no need for commitment in this world or that one should not honor their commitments. One need only check in with their soul to understand the alignment of the commitment with the experience the soul is looking to have. If we’ve made a commitment to one and we feel that we have grown beyond that experience and are looking to move in a more expansive direction than other, is it the commitment we made when we were not yet this expansive? Is it what we should confine our now expansive energy to? You know this can be a commitment with a human being, a commitment with a job, or a commitment in any way – a friendship, a role you are playing in your family. It is always about checking in and aligning or checking in on the alignment of the commitment with who it is your soul is looking to be in the moment and what it is your soul is looking to experience.

Our relationships as mirrors or self-explorations

I look at my relationships as something we attract into our lives as we are on this journey of self-discovery and the they offer us a chance to look at ourselves and what we’ve brought into our lives.

Life itself is the journey of self-exploration and every relationship brings you the opportunity to know you on a deeper level. There is no doubt about that. Some people in the metaphysical community like to purport that when someone is challenging you that what you see in them is what you see in you and that is why you’ve brought the experience to you. This has some validity. There is no doubt about that as we all are one energy. What you see in them does exist in you to some point, to some extent, in some aspect of you. But the true experience is about how you react in this life; what affect that energy has on you and your ability to remain intact, to remain aligned with your truth to see through the invitation to join them there in order to exist in integrity.

That’s what life is all about, isn’t it? It is always a challenge to hide, to hide from our truths.

Each and every situation in our life is an opportunity for exactly that – an opportunity to go deeper into the darkness so we can’t see ourselves or to expose the light that exists in every experience if we are willing to find it. But it is difficult, especially when it comes with interpersonal relationships in this human experience because the human being has not yet brought this awareness into their conscious display of affection. The idea that this life is a journey of self-exploration should give you a sense of just how many opportunities there are and how many interactions you have had to be exposed to so many of the self-limiting beliefs and inclinations of the mind. This is most certainly facilitated through our closest relationships. Those are the ones we bring in to really, really help us get to know who we really are and what it is we allow to get in between who we are and who we allow ourselves to be.

On Commitments

In one of the most freeing relationships I ever had we felt we could be in love and be together and grow but not have the pressure of a forever after marriage. It didn’t make it any less serious or less committed. It was the most mature relationship I had ever been in.

The idea of commitments, the idea of anything in the physical plane, comes from a spiritual origin and so you want to recognize that. A commitment is a real thing in the energy. There are real commitments made by souls between souls. Now when you try to manifest in the physical what you sense in the deepest parts of who you are, well, you know sometimes the interpretation gets convoluted. Sometimes the ego gets in the way and adds its own logical interpretation to what it is you are trying to sense there. So we do when we have these relationships, when we have those signs and trigger with those people in our lives, they are commitments. There is no doubt that when you feel that spark with another that is a reminder that you have a commitment with this other. You have a commitment – a soul to soul commitment – to be in a certain way for a certain someone, for that certain someone’s growth and they have committed to be a certain way in your experience for your growth.

That’s what relationships are about whether they be the partner in your life, the sibling in your life, or the friends in your life. We don’t need these human, logical, legal commitments when we honor our soulful commitments. You see, human beings don’t give us credit, human beings don’t give themselves enough credit. They don’t trust that they can honor their soul.

They’ve seen how far they can step away from the desires of the soul and they know how weak they can be. Yet there are some here that know how strong they can be and know that the commitment need never be on paper, that the understanding exists on a much deeper level than logic. That’s where the true commitment lies. When two souls know that commitment is there they don’t need anyone in the physical to validate it. The only aspect of this experience that needs that validation is the doubting mind, the fear-driven ego that says I must see it in the physical in order to believe it. I must see it in writing so that I can hold on to that to know that it is real. Don’t you see the ridiculousness here because once the commitment is done in the energy it is done in the physical, no matter how hard you try? No matter how you waive that piece of paper in the air saying but I have it in writing, when it is done in the energy it is done.

Anybody – anybody who has moved through a major relationship – knows this truth. It is about honoring the souls and there are times when the souls do bring in challenges to have the human being questioning the commitment. There is not a cut and dry, black and white kind of concrete answer that any of you are looking for. It is, once again, a challenge for you to get to know you; to get to know how you intuit what it is your soul is guiding you to.

Getting out of your comfort zone

Yes, it is about expanding the information that we give you, isn’t it? It is about expanding it and applying it in many different areas of your experience. So of course you would go to the family and, of course, you would go to the friends. Now take it to a more expansive direction. Let’s talk about the relationship you have with your career, what you think defines who you are. Let’s talk about your relationship with your environment, your community, your home. How long have you lived there? How long have you existed there? How much of this world have you explored?

How comfortable have you become in this one, set base on this Earth knowing that this whole wide world is available for you to explore, to be a part? When you explore other areas of the world you get to feel different energies. Every different culture, every different community, every different city and sidewalk, has a different feel to it, a different energy to it. That is what you are here to explore in this lifetime - all that you possibly can. You want to engage every different energy on the Earth while you are here. If not, what is the purpose? - to look at the same four walls, to look at the same view, to look at the same people, and to have the same experience just because you feel safe in it?

Ah, dear souls, when you leave the earth plane you regret one and only one thing – the things you didn’t do because of fear. That is why you want to push yourself out of your comfort zone. You want to push yourself to check in on your relationships in your life, with every area of your life, and ask yourself, “Am I living an astute life? Am I aligned with my soulful purpose in every area of my life?” You laugh at this idea that it is possible living in the society and the culture and the world in which it is today. You think that that is just utterly ridiculous. This is nonsensical and I cannot give my energy over to it. Right there in that moment you limit your ability to experience this life fully just because your little mind can’t figure out how.

Haven’t we existed long enough as a species to realize we cannot predict what is going to happen next? We cannot predict what the next generation will bring in or the generation after that what this life will look like. In even 20, 30, 40 years there will be a whole new creation. There will be a whole new way of existing. Ask anyone, anyone on the earth plane today, that was on the earth in the early 1900s what looks the same today? How differently do we exist than we did back then? Just knowing that that is possible gives you the hope of what can be changed, what can shift in a matter of generations. It all starts with how you begin to perceive how this all works, how your energy affects every aspect of your experience. It is all a choice. Do you stay in this little corner of the world, in this same house, in this same career because it feels safe, because it is defined and you feel it is controllable? Do you deny your soul these expansive experiences because your human is comfortable, because your human is fearful? Or can you allow the energy to give you a sense of a new direction whether it be in a relationship with another, a relationship with your job?

As you assess the value of the relationships with your friends can you dismiss the expectations you have of what it means to be a friend and can you look at these souls in your life as that – as soulful partners on the journey. Each and every one has a little energy to add to your experience as you do for them. Your souls don’t judge each other when you go exploring new experiences and new energies. You don’t judge each other if you have an experience that another doesn’t.

You embrace each other. You support each other. You get a sense of their experience through their willingness to share. That’s what we do here in spirit. We share all of who we are. There is not one tiny, little aspect of any soul that is not full shared here in spirit. You can know that that stands true for all of you. Everything – everything you do – you share freely in the spiritual realm. Your soul brings the energy of every experience you have into this collective energy where each and every one of us swim, play, dance and learn. That is what relationships are all about. They are the way we interact. They are the way we engage one another as souls and the way they manifest in the physical is dictated by your willingness to define it from that soulful level, from that soulful sense of knowing and not limited by some human interpretation.

Breaking up your job relationship

Many people have jobs that don’t fulfill them but don’t think of them as a relationship that they can break up with.

It is more all-encompassing than your personal relationships because people define themselves by their career. When you meet someone you don’t say who are you with? You say what do you do? It is about what you do for a living that defines people in these societies and that’s where we get lost and we end up losing our identity around our career. So when you think of it as a relationship we don’t see how you could not when it is so personal and people bring it in to their field as if it is a part of who they are. Well if it is a part of who you are then shouldn’t it be a part of who you are? Shouldn’t a part of who you are be what you are integrating in this world, what you are doing, so to speak, what you are creating?

That’s what you do, right? You create in this world. That’s what everyone does. Creations are everything that is - not just art, not just sculptures and paintings. Everything in this world that you can see, feel, and touch is a creation, even the intellectual property. They are all creations that began in the energy that someone brought into this world. That’s what they were doing. They were bringing their inspiration into this world and that’s what souls are here to do.

They bring whatever it is they came to bring and do it in whatever way they came to do it and their soul knows that. Just like the soul knows when they are aligned with the energy of that personal relationship, that partner in their life, the soul also knows when the energy of a career is done. It is just as difficult, sometimes even more difficult, for the human being to accept that one when the energy of a job that you once loved is all of a sudden not there anymore. It confounds the mind.

There we go again. Logic takes you in that direction of, you love this. You love doing this. You’ve always loved doing this so you must just continue. It served you until now, so why would you not stay? There are so many practical reasons that the mind can come up with to go against what you know. When it is done, it is done. Allow yourself to believe that and move on. Why force something?

You know so many of you out there are trying to force the way it should be or they are sitting in stagnation. Ask yourself how long – how long do you want to try to force this logical interpretation of who it is are and what it is you should be doing before you realize that your soul, this time, may not be giving in? Your soul is saying, oh no, I am not doing that again. We either find something else to do or we’re going to sit here in the midst of this power struggle. That’s what happens. The ego takes a stance that says this is the way it has to be. I’m human. I’m here in this physical society that dictates life in this way and so I must abide. The ego wants to conform. The ego wants to be comfortable, safe. The ego wants a sense of control over life. So doing something you are good at, doing something that you’ve done for quite a long time, gives you a sense of safety and control.

But remember the soul - that part of you that came to explore every aspect of life it possibly could while here in this incarnation? That soul doesn’t want to force the status quo to dictate the remainder of the lifetime. Expand! Allow yourself to grow with life! Believe that! That is what life is about.

It is about changing and evolving through change, through a willingness to let go of what once was so that you can see what could be! Humans tend to be so self-limiting, so certain about how life should be according to what they’ve been told, according to what they’ve been taught. We ask you each to look around at life and all of the precepts, all of the certainties that were handed down to you in the way things should be – what was expected of you and what outcomes you can expect if you follow suit. Ask yourself how many people you know live in that life and are loving it; living according to some rules or expectations created outside of themselves

This is a time where your soul is asking you to remember who you truly are and it is through these experiences that challenge us that we are creating the opportunity to see where we are limiting our own experience. Nobody here in spirit judges your inability to face your fears. We only look to inspire you to try; knowing all along that if you do and once you do that you will feel the release, that you will feel the freedom, and that you will come into alignment with a truth that can define for you exactly who you are and what you are here to share in this world, what you are here to experience and who you are here to engage. But it takes a willingness to accept life through an intuitive sense of knowing. So, once again, we challenge you to find you.

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